I want my baby.

I want my baby. I just want her back.

 Originally posted May 25, 2014
Susan Hines's photo.
Jennifer Heine Heaven feels so far away, knowing you miss her with every breath, and not knowing what to say. My heart is full of sorrow for your grief …much love to you, my sweet friend.

Amy Ramadan
Amy Ramadan frown emoticon soo sorry

Susan Hines
Susan Hines How much heartache can I bear?

Amy Ramadan
Amy Ramadan I cant explain the pain your feeling but i know what you are feeling to a point and as much as u feel like the world is just going to end and in your mind it probably has but just know soo many people are praying for you sweetie i wish i could do something to take the pain away but its all part of the healing process and it sucks your going to feel hurt, anger,pain but i promise ONE day it will start to ease out like i said it will never go away and youll always long for your baby girl but the pain your feeling will get lighter but till then lean on all the support you hve dont feel like you cant vent, cry, scream to us we are here for you in way you need us to be! ((( hugs to you)))

Susan Hines
Amy Ramadan
Amy Ramadan Your soo welcome susan heart emoticon

Susan Hines
Susan Hines I know there are hundreds if not thousands of people who wish they could somehow change this for me. It doesn’t yet make sense to me why He didn’t change the outcome of this somehow, but I know that whatever His reasons, it was not for lack of prayer and pleading. And that is of some comfort.

Kathy Holmes
Kathy Holmes We all wish we could take your pain away. But all we can do is surround you with love and prayer!

Amy Ramadan
Amy Ramadan Completely agree susan with you!

Megan McKinney
Misty Morris
Misty Morris Kisses hugs & loves hang in there he has a great reason why he did this & when it is time he will let you know

Richard Pfeifer
Jennifer Ricker
Carrie Hammons
Carrie Hammons Of course you do, we all do… We were watching a video today on a series called the heart of Passion By Louie Giglio and He was talking about a story of a young girl who had given her life to Christ and just 4 months later died in a tragic car accident… Her Brother cried out to God and believed him for a miracle just as you did … He new God could save her. When that did not happen that boy said He Questioned God All together and even walked away from Him … why bother he thought…. Then one day he decided to ask God once again ” Why didn’t you save Ashley ? ” and he said that this time it was different, I actually listened he said. I could feel God literally wrap His arms around me and I heard Him Whisper ” I did save her ” You see, he said He reminded me that Ashley new Him & that in reality He did save her from Death and that on that day when I though she had died… He just took her to live with Him. He went on to share I do not know if I will ever understand why God wanted Ashley when He did… And I know that my life will Never be normal again, But I will continue to grow in God’s Grace… and allow Him to comfort me and provide Peace and Hope that are beyond my understanding… Furthermore, he shared that the struggle within is a constant struggle that goes back and forth, some day’s are better then others… Laughing, Crying, Living and Dying… It’s a circle that’s very exhausting ! Continuing in Faith but almost loosing a grip on Hope all at the same time….. He stated that God has never explained it in detail to him … But He Hold’s him and assures him of His love for him and he hold’s on to the knowing that the cross allowed Ashley to live for Eternity and the Cross also tells us that when the bottom falls out we can run towards the Cross into the arm’s of Christ not from Him, Because He is the only one who understand’s. The hope we find in Him allows us to leverage our darkest moments for His Glory. Susan, I know a lot have said they admire your strength and even I said I was in awe of you to be counting your Blessings in a time like this and that your perspective truly is a testimony to God’s unfailing Love for us because of your unwavering Faith in Him even in this, everyone can see the Hope you have only as a result of Christ being our savior and your willingness to share so Boldly that ” You will see her again ” speaks volumes and is so life giving … I heard it once said ” The world down here may think I’m strong, but they are wrong… You carry me ! ” I Know that it is to much for you to carry, you know it is too. You were never meant too… continue to give it back to God, allowing Him to continue to bear it for you… He is giving you the strength you need as you continue to turn to Him. Thank you so much for sharing the most intimate vulnerable places in your heart with us… It is in your weakness that He is made strong… and we are all in this journey with you getting to know Him in an even greater way as a result. XXXOOO Carrie

Paul Ricker
Paul Ricker we are all here for you

Susan Hines
Susan Hines Thank you Carrie, I just don’t know how to do this. I know that I will survive, I know I’m not the first Mama to know this heartache. But, it is so hard. I live for my God, not any other human, even my children. However, I am so bonded to her that I can hardly stand not to have her in my arms. I thought describing the pain would help. I thought seeking to have the right attitude would help. I thought getting out and doing something, something normal would help. I thought staying in and letting myself rest and cry would help. I thought somewhere I would find peace and strength. But although most of those things helped some, I still find myself feeling so very lost. I lost her, but I’m the one who feels lost. I know it’s a process and I know I’m doing ‘the right things,’ I just plain hurt. In ways I’ve never known.

Petra Alvarez
Petra Alvarez HI Susan – no one expects you to know how to do this – no one can tell you – how – but I have been reading your posts and you are doing the best thing you can- you are leaning on God – because the truth is HE is the only one who can walk you down the road of healing – know that we are praying for you unceasingly – Petra

Carrie Hammons
Carrie Hammons I don’t have you current #, Are you home ? Do want want some company ? I can come spend the night … You are not alone, God is with you Always and I am here for you too. We love you and He Loves you more !

Dana Joyce Birch
Dana Joyce Birch Susan you are always in my thoughts and prayers.

Daniel Kisimba
Daniel Kisimba Susan, I really can’t figure out what to say to you.

Daniel Kisimba
Daniel Kisimba Your situation is never been felt ever. It wil take some time but dont give up on HIM. He tries us in many ways and he gives and takes. I believe baby Eleanor looks at you each and every moment but she can’t help it .

Daniel Kisimba
Daniel Kisimba God is ever there for us and He listens to our cries. Many ask and recieve immediately and many’s prayers take long. It took long to believe I’m an orphan. Even today when I sit and think about my father, I cry but i can live that way. I just have to accept it and ask God to make good and clean path for all those going before us.

Liebe Ziegel
Liebe Ziegel Mike’s sister lost her 6 month old baby about 2 years ago. I’m only going to say this to offer some more hope: she and all her family are doing fine now. They’re actually happy! He was (is) a sweet, happy, fantastic child. At the time, it totally seemed like an insurmountable thing. /:

Susan Hines
Susan Hines I remember. Thank you. It’s good to know things will get less worse someday.

Becky Shetka Olson
Becky Shetka Olson You’ll yearn for her the rest of your life. The pain just won’t cut as deep or hurt as much the more time that goes by. And eventually, you _WILL_ have her back. (Romans 8:11, 1 Thes 4:16) Keep your hope there.

Michele Lynn Hall
Michele Lynn Hall One more breath, one more step….He’ll help you. The words from Sweet Adoration just popped into my mind. Maybe there was a reason beyond what you knew that was Eleanor’s favorite song. Hugs to you!

Danna E. Garcia
Danna E. Garcia We’re with you through this journey. We can’t make the pain go away, but we can share your burdens with you. Whatever it takes and how ever long it lasts.

Stephanie Bickle
Stephanie Bickle I love you Susan. Savannah too she says.


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